Techsurvivors
Archives => 2003 => Topic started by: jepinto on February 13, 2003, 06:56:00 AM
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Letters from the dog
Dear God, How come people love to smell flowers, but seldom, if ever, smell one another? Where are their priorities?
Dear God, When we get to Heaven, can we sit on your couch? Or is it the same old story?
Dear God, Excuse me, but why are there cars named after the jaguar, the cougar, the mustang, the colt, the stingray, and the rabbit, but not one named for a dog? How often do you see a cougar riding around? We dogs love a nice ride! I know every breed can't have its own model, but it would be easy to rename the Chrysler Eagle the Chrysler Beagle!
Dear God, If a dog barks his head off in the forest and no human hears him, does he still get his bottom whacked with a newspaper?
Dear God, Is it true that in Heaven, dining room tables have on-ramps?
Dear God, If we come back as humans, is that good, or bad?
Dear God, More meatballs, less spaghetti.
Dear God, When we get to the Pearly Gates, do we have to do that stupid shake hands trick to get in?
Dear God, We dogs can understand human verbal instructions, hand signals, whistles, horns, clickers, beepers, scent IDs, electromagnetic energy fields, and Frisbee flight paths. What do humans understand?
Dear God, Are there dogs on other planets or are we alone? I have been howling at the moon and stars for a long time, but all I ever hear back is the horny beagle across the street.
Dear God, Are there mailmen in Heaven? If there are, will I have to apologize to them?
Dear God, Is it true that dogs are not allowed in restaurants because we can't make up our minds what NOT to order? Or is it the accident on the carpet thing, again?
Dear God, May I have my privates back?
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All good questions, Jenny. I know my two sure have it made around here. This week alone: Shots, heartworm pills and groomer - $180. Seeing those two little faces everytime I walk through the door - Priceless!
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These are great, Jennie! I'll tell you the first time I truly knew how attached I was to Molly--and pet owners and parents will understand. When she was a puppy I came downstairs one Saturday morning and found that she had been "sick" all over the place. She looked terrible and when I went over to her she really felt hot. I called the Vet and they asked me what her temperature was. I chuckled and said "I don't know!" They said "You need to go take it!" My obvious questions were "How, Where??" And yep-- you guessed it, I had to lay her across my lap like a baby and take it from you know where. She gave me a strange look but let me take the temperature. (Any of you ever had to do that to a golden retriever??) My wife and kids were more than happy to let me have that job.
She ended up at the Vet's office--had to have a fluid pouch put under her skin because she was so dehydrated, add labwork, medicine, etc.--Sluggo, I KNOW you understand the cost of that visit. Still, by the end of the day all I could think of was how glad I was she was ok.
[ 02-13-2003, 02:26 PM: Message edited by: RobW ]