Post by: krissel on June 01, 2008, 04:16:39 AM
[attachment=973:turtle3.JPG]
Who's visiting you?
Post by: Paddy on June 01, 2008, 08:03:37 AM
Best I could (almost) do lately is the raccoon eating a discarded sandwich in the dumpster in front of the house they're building across the street! He didn't seem afraid of me, so I went to get my camera, but then made the mistake of saying "Hello" to him - at which point he turned his back and climbed out of the bin and waddled off to the backyard. Wild animals these days...no manners!
Post by: Frances144 on June 01, 2008, 08:53:01 AM
Please can you post to me as soon as possible a live raccoon. I promise to look after him well and to hug him and call him George!
Thank you very much.
Yours sincerely
Frances
Post by: george on June 01, 2008, 09:49:47 AM
George
Post by: Frances144 on June 01, 2008, 11:58:45 AM
Please post to me one live raccoon, stock permitting. I would like to have one so I can love and hug him and call him George.
Thank you very much.
Yours sincerely
Frances
PS I did not know raccoons were indigenous animals of Newcastle upon Tyne - you learn something new every day!
Post by: george on June 01, 2008, 12:31:04 PM
George
Post by: Frances144 on June 01, 2008, 01:02:37 PM
Please do not send yourself just because you are called George. I would return you immediately. This is because you are not a raccoon.
I do, however, want this animal so if you could just check your supply and send me one, I would be most grateful.
Yours sincerely
Frances
PS I reiterate, no George human, just George raccoon, please. Thank you very much.
Post by: george on June 01, 2008, 01:28:26 PM
George.
Post by: Frances144 on June 01, 2008, 02:03:51 PM
The ghost of George is still not Raccoon George. Please do not send a ghost but a real life raccoon that I can "love and hug, blah, blah...."
This is a very serious request as I need a Raccoon to be called George so I would repeat my request that you keep looking for the said animal.
Yours sincerely
Frances
Post by: george on June 01, 2008, 02:12:23 PM
George.
p.s.
why not put an advert in the Shetland Times.
Post by: Frances144 on June 01, 2008, 02:39:56 PM
Thank you for your encouraging reply. Roll on July!
Your suggestion to put an advertisement in "The Old Rock" has already been done with scant results. To be honest, there is a singular dearth, not to say complete absence, of raccoon at present on the Shetland Islands hence my search outwith.
I will, however, remain hopeful that a raccoon will be forthcoming from your neck of the woods soonest.
Yours sincerely
Frances
Post by: george on June 01, 2008, 02:44:02 PM
forever at your service Madam.
George
ps
now go to bed!
Post by: Frances144 on June 01, 2008, 03:08:48 PM
Post by: Xairbusdriver on June 01, 2008, 04:27:12 PM
Frances and George, please take advantage of the government supplied health services in your area immediately! Please also refrain from associating with pets. Many of whom may not have had their vaccinations!
Hope you both are well and back to your 'normal' selves as soon as possible!
OTOH, how will we know...
Post by: Gregg on June 01, 2008, 04:38:25 PM
QUOTE(Xairbusdriver @ Jun 1 2008, 04:27 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Frances and George,
Seems to me that there's a cardinal in Chicago with both of those names. Would that work?
Post by: kimmer on June 01, 2008, 09:12:25 PM
Post by: kimmer on June 01, 2008, 09:28:52 PM
Kindly purchase one round trip ticket to the central coast of Oregon (actually you'll have to fly to Portland and then rent a car and drive down the coast). Once here, go to the local pet store and purchase a nice, large, very, very, very sturdy cage. With cage in hand, call us at 1-800-WEE-TRAP and we'll direct you to the tree where these critters hang out -- or on as the case may be. They are there most afternoons.
Dangling Raccoon
Where's a ladder when you need one?
Gee, George! You sure are in a sticky wicket!
As you can see, sometimes the one raccoon gets into a bit of a sticky wicket. We assume that's the male of the pair. He would likely make a perfect George (although we wouldn't want anyone to think that we think all George's get into sticky wickets on a regular basis. We're told that sticky wickets often attract Charlie's and Sam's and even Fred's).
We are sure that with the right treat you should be able to entice these raccoons out of the tree and into your cage, whereupon you can whisk them home to your cozy abode, feed them well and train them to be pets. With 2 you get egg rolls, perhaps?
If you are interested, please contact us immediately.
Sincerely,
The Fine Folks at WEETRAP (WE Eagerly Trap Raccoons and Possums)
Post by: Paddy on June 02, 2008, 08:13:25 AM
QUOTE
Certainly, having a 'wild' animal not run at the approach of a human indicates it is either being fed by one or is, indeed, suffering from some malady
Um...Jim...you haven't met the raccoons of Toronto.
These are the guys who look up from your over-turned trash can and practically ask you "Can I help you?" with the surly indifference of the worst sort of shop assistant. While they will usually leave if you get too close, they don't do so with any great speed, and will come right back again the moment you've left. We had some who somehow figured out how to get the top off our Rubbermaid garbage enclosure and THEN attack the garbage bins inside. Since this not only requires a great deal of force (you're basically taking the lid off it's hinges) and they only had the edge of a chain link fence to stand on while doing so, it was quite the feat. And they did it twice. The first time we figured we'd somehow gotten the lid off its hinges - the second time was after we put everything back!! They probably work in gangs...
Anyway - we now have a carabiner through the lockable bit...so far they haven't figured out carabiners!!So Frances, if you want to come to Toronto to get some of these guys, Toronto will be forever grateful and everyone in the Shetland Islands will be ready to shoot you.
Unfortunately they also don't make good pets - fine until about a year, but turn very unpredictable after that. You don't want to be bitten by one - ask our cat. They're also extremely smelly when living in your attic or garage.
As for diseases, Jim, the last case of raccoon rabies in Ontario was in 2005, and Quebec has almost eliminated it as well. One of the benefits of having a border running through major waterways, I suppose - easier to keep things like this out! (I know you'll come back with some sort of pithy remark!)
Post by: gunug on June 02, 2008, 08:23:55 AM
Frances - I got the Bugs Bunny reference immediately but I'm not sure George did?
An old coworker from years ago was a German lady who loved skunks enough to go under houses and such to remove them from that human environment. She kept some herself and took them with her back to Germany when she moved back (she had to have them de-scented before the German Government would allow this).
Post by: george on June 02, 2008, 08:26:24 AM
A plague upon you
George
Post by: Frances144 on June 02, 2008, 11:24:42 AM
QUOTE(george @ Jun 2 2008, 08:26 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
A plague upon you
A plague of raccoons - is that the collective noun?
Post by: Frances144 on June 02, 2008, 11:30:07 AM
QUOTE(kimmer @ Jun 1 2008, 09:28 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Dear Frances,
Kindly purchase one round trip ticket to the central coast of Oregon (actually you'll have to fly to Portland and then rent a car and drive down the coast). Once here, go to the local pet store and purchase a nice, large, very, very, very sturdy cage. With cage in hand, call us at 1-800-WEE-TRAP and we'll direct you to the tree where these critters hang out -- or on as the case may be. They are there most afternoons.
Dangling Raccoon
Where's a ladder when you need one?
Gee, George! You sure are in a sticky wicket!
As you can see, sometimes the one raccoon gets into a bit of a sticky wicket. We assume that's the male of the pair. He would likely make a perfect George (although we wouldn't want anyone to think that we think all George's get into sticky wickets on a regular basis. We're told that sticky wickets often attract Charlie's and Sam's and even Fred's).
We are sure that with the right treat you should be able to entice these raccoons out of the tree and into your cage, whereupon you can whisk them home to your cozy abode, feed them well and train them to be pets. With 2 you get egg rolls, perhaps?
If you are interested, please contact us immediately.
Sincerely,
The Fine Folks at WEETRAP (WE Eagerly Trap Raccoons and Possums)
Kindly purchase one round trip ticket to the central coast of Oregon (actually you'll have to fly to Portland and then rent a car and drive down the coast). Once here, go to the local pet store and purchase a nice, large, very, very, very sturdy cage. With cage in hand, call us at 1-800-WEE-TRAP and we'll direct you to the tree where these critters hang out -- or on as the case may be. They are there most afternoons.
Dangling Raccoon
Where's a ladder when you need one?
Gee, George! You sure are in a sticky wicket!
As you can see, sometimes the one raccoon gets into a bit of a sticky wicket. We assume that's the male of the pair. He would likely make a perfect George (although we wouldn't want anyone to think that we think all George's get into sticky wickets on a regular basis. We're told that sticky wickets often attract Charlie's and Sam's and even Fred's).
We are sure that with the right treat you should be able to entice these raccoons out of the tree and into your cage, whereupon you can whisk them home to your cozy abode, feed them well and train them to be pets. With 2 you get egg rolls, perhaps?
If you are interested, please contact us immediately.
Sincerely,
The Fine Folks at WEETRAP (WE Eagerly Trap Raccoons and Possums)
Dear Kimmer
Please meet me at your airport for collection and transport to your local raccoon catching supply store whereupon I will purchase a WEETRAP forthwith.
Transport to the raccoon recreation area would also be appreciated and any tips for George enticements would be useful.
Once George has been trapped, crated and moved to the Shetland Islands, I will be able to offer regular updates as to his general progress.
Yours sincerely
Frances
Potential Raccoon Owner of the Hugging Variety
Post by: Highmac on June 02, 2008, 12:36:12 PM
Post by: kimmer on June 02, 2008, 02:59:45 PM
QUOTE(Frances144 @ Jun 2 2008, 09:30 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Dear Kimmer
Please meet me at your airport for collection and transport to your local raccoon catching supply store whereupon I will purchase a WEETRAP forthwith.
Transport to the raccoon recreation area would also be appreciated and any tips for George enticements would be useful.
Once George has been trapped, crated and moved to the Shetland Islands, I will be able to offer regular updates as to his general progress.
Yours sincerely
Frances
Potential Raccoon Owner of the Hugging Variety
Please meet me at your airport for collection and transport to your local raccoon catching supply store whereupon I will purchase a WEETRAP forthwith.
Transport to the raccoon recreation area would also be appreciated and any tips for George enticements would be useful.
Once George has been trapped, crated and moved to the Shetland Islands, I will be able to offer regular updates as to his general progress.
Yours sincerely
Frances
Potential Raccoon Owner of the Hugging Variety
Dear Frances,
While I would truly enjoy meeting you, and helping you to entice George (fresh raw eggs often do the trick) into your WEETRAP, I'm afraid I will be unable to meet you at the Portland airport. The airport is located in a very large metropolis, filled with cars and people all going catty whompus on the streets. They scare me. I'd rather be left dangling in the tree with George as play bumper car and doge the pedestrian in the big city.
So, regretfully, unless you are willing and able to rent a car and travel down the coast (it is lovely this time of year - the sun often comes out for an hour or two each day), we (The Fine Folks at WEETRAP) will be unable to assist you in securing a fuzzy pet.
Kimmer, disappointed manager of WEETRAP
Post by: kimmer on June 02, 2008, 03:09:36 PM
QUOTE(Highmac @ Jun 2 2008, 10:36 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I don't know what you lot are on.... but I want some!!!
Dear Neil,
WEETRAP uses only the finest natural ingredients around.
Sincerely
The Fine Folks at WEETRAP
Post by: Frances144 on June 02, 2008, 04:34:22 PM
Thank you for your prompt response.
Whilst I completely understand your desire to wimp out and stay with the raccoons, would you be so kind as to drape yourself in the aforementioned raw egg until my arrival with a suitable box for George? That would be most helpful. Negotiations with your local airport will be dealt accordingly by myself. Please expect me soonest as I feel certain that George will not be keen on an old-egged person. I am sure he is a fresh-egg person kind of raccoon.
Yours sincerely
Frances
Post by: Gregg on June 02, 2008, 08:50:02 PM
This one takes the cake!
Post by: Paddy on June 02, 2008, 10:36:52 PM
George, after a lovely gourmet meal.
Post by: Frances144 on June 03, 2008, 03:29:10 AM
Ooooh that tum-tum - don't just want to tickle it and kiss him! He is gorgeous!
Post by: krissel on June 03, 2008, 04:38:02 AM
This guy was on my porch nibbling on the impatiens last summer (at night). Took pic through window in door without flash so it's not very clear.
[attachment=977:racoon_on_porch.jpg]
Paddy, the turtle is the common Eastern box turtle. He was pretty good sized, about an eight inch shell. I first noticed him when I was looking out the window during a rain storm on Saturday and noticed something that looked like an injured squirrel dragging itself across the back end of the lawn. After a bit I saw a head stretch up and realized it was a turtle. When the lightning died down I went out to get a pic. He was a bit stunned by the camera flash and took several minutes to move on.
I had one many years ago that crossed the yard in the afternoon like clockwork but I think he had once been a pet because there were some painted markings on his shell. This guy is quite colorful all on his own.
Post by: jwboyd on June 03, 2008, 09:40:19 AM
Post by: Frances144 on June 03, 2008, 03:56:19 PM
Please stop photographing raccoons and concentrate your efforts on luring one into a pet-carrier. Once you have your raccoon, please attach a small label addressed to myself and enough stamps to send him to Shetland.
I can assure you that your package will be loved and hugged alot. We will also feed him raw eggs, tuna sandwiches and tickle his little fat tum-tum on a regular basis.
Once he answers to the name of George, he will be permitted the run of my estate and will be treated as one of the family. Good table manners should be mentioned at this point because they would, of course, be an advantage when you are considering your choice of whom to lure. I am rather a stickler for manners on the whole.
With kind regards and please wear gloves.
Yours sincerely
Frances
Post by: george on June 03, 2008, 04:12:05 PM
George.
Post by: Frances144 on June 03, 2008, 04:17:09 PM
Raccoon costume
Post by: george on June 03, 2008, 04:22:14 PM
George